To The So-Called Doctor Solomon,
I think that you are a fake! These contrived letters and responses of yours are an embarrassment to the sober work of this journal. Who will take NCJ seriously after they read your nonsense? You have upset me so much that I am suffering from a bout of constipation.
Not Amused
Dear Not Amused,
Please do not attribute your constipation to me—I am attempting to bring you relief. A good laugh loosens the bowels. It is also good theology. Take idolatry, for example. Serious business, eh? But God Himself takes up the task of satirizing such foolishness. For example, in Jeremiah 10:5 he describes idols as “scarecrows in a cucumber field.” That’s pretty funny. So lighten up. And eat a little more roughage.